I have failed to do so

If you are going to pray something for me right now, would you pray for mercy?

I have not been merciful, I have not been gracious. I have been harsh, and hard, and unpleasant. I have been rude. I have been selfish.

I have not loved mercy in every way.

Oh, my soul longs for this,
yet I continue not to come even close!

I haven't loved recieving mercy as I should, because, to be frank, I don't forgive myself. And when I don't forgive my own heart, how can I see that others have? How can I see that Christ has? I have not poured out mercy as I should, and I have been harsh, and not as intentional as I should be. Especially in cases of family.

If you are going to pray, please pray that I would be loving mercy in every way.